Birthday card from Hallmark's current Mahogany division aimed at African Americans
In a recent press release, Hallmark announced a significant change to its thriving greeting card division. Donald J. Hall, Jr., CEO of Hallmark, discussed the change: ”We feel that the greeting card market is starting to stagnate. We’ve already cornered the market on the black consumers with the Mahogany line and on teens with our humorous Shoebox line. Old people will buy anything that says Hallmark on it, but we’re still missing out on a huge segment of the population.”
Hall continued to say that while middle-class white Americans either use e-cards or still purchase Hallmark, white Americans who are at a lower-class income level view Hallmark as being financially unattainable with products at a price point akin to a sit-down dinner at Bob Evans or a pair of jeans from Target.
“I’m very proud to introduce our newest line of cards geared directly towards the poor, ignorant, white American. The Hallmark General Lee line will be priced to sell, and retailers will be directed to accept food stamps and WIC cards as payment. No longer will little Bobby need to wonder what type of card to get for his sister-momma or which card is the most appropriate to give condolences to parents who just lost their child to the evils of homosexuality.”
The cards will appear in in the South and the Midwest first before the line is expanded nationwide. At the time of the press release, no cards were available to be reviewed, but Hall did share a few of his favorite messages:
For Valentine’s Day: ”Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love even though your nose makes you look like a Jew.”
To offer condolences: ”God works in mysterious ways, and we are not meant to understand the plan He has for anyone. Please accept my most sincere regrets for blowing up your son in my meth lab.”
From a mom to her son on graduation: ”Congratulations, graduate! Not everyone can graduate fifth grade and celebrate their 21st birthday at the same time! You will always be my special boy.”
The General Lee cards can be purchased wherever Hallmark cards and/or bait and tackle is sold.
