The Republican leadership has had to face hard facts – Michelle Bachmann is never going to be the president. Sarah Palin is never going to be president. As much as it pains the Republican National Committee (RNC) to accept the fact that neither of these women can carry the country, they have a solid strategy: replacing Bachmann with an even more bizarre female candidate next time around.
After “Shoot ‘em up” Palin, Americans thought that Republicans couldn’t find a weirder female candidate. Of course, Michelle Bachman proved them wrong. As much as the average Republican feminist loves to hear a witchcraft supporter quote the Bible about being submissive to he husband, it looks like the GOP is going to need to go further.
Some ideas that the Republican think tanks are throwing around:
- Phyllis Diller
- Margot Kidder
- Whitney Cummings
- Squeaky Fromme
- Paula Abdul
- Britney Spears
- Yoko Ono
- Courtney Love
RNC insiders report that the party is unsure is any of these women are Republicans, an they aren’t even 100% sure they are all still alive. Plus they’re pretty sure Yoko Ono isn’t eligible since she was born in Japan.
Despite these doubts, though, many staunch party members are expressing faith that the years after 2012 may bring on enough crazy to win the game.