Today’s senior citizen has probably read in the news or heard in passing conversation about the damaging and scandalous effects of sexting on today’s youth. A few may be concerned about the downward turn in society caused by sexting, and others are just plain ashamed that their family has been affected by such technological debauchery.
Let’s face it, though, most of the over-65 crowd are wondering two things: “What exactly is this ‘sexting’ and where can I get some?”
Sexting is the new, hip way that youngsters express their physical desires to each other. The days of “free love” and “anonymous casual sex” that past generations experienced in eras gone by have vanished. Getting freaky in the back seat now relies on using technology to send naughty text messages via cellular telephone to a potential mate to get him or her into the mood.
Statistics show that senior citizens are not the most adept at sexting, possibly due to a fear of technology. This guide will help today’s senior put the “mature adult” back into “mature adults only” by making the most of their golden years by making sense of sexting.
Sexting only works on cell phones. This is the biggest obstacle of all — sexy seniors will have to make that leap from old-fashioned wall phones to smart phones. The best way to choose the right phone is to find a fifteen year-old grandchild who can pick out a top-of-the line “ready for sexting” smartphone.
semi-spherical requiring physical support to prevent concrete scraping is dangling from the body.
LOLTIHC: Laugh Out Loud Turning Into Hacking Cough
WTD: What the Dickens?!?
ROTFBISCGU: Rolling on the Floor Because I Simply Can’t Get Up
GCLOMS: Grandchild Looking Over my Shoulder
KT: Kids Today…
IHTTMN: I Have To Take My Nitroglycerin
PFTLOCSC911: Please, for the Love of Christ, Somebody Call 911
Senior citizens are inventive; they’ll adapt and get the hang of the rest of it. In no time, ambitious sexting seniors will rival younger counterparts right up until they feel that familiar burning sensation in their nether regions which means one of two things: a spastic bladder or a great sexting relationship.
As long as it’s not both, it’s going to be a thrilling ride!
Photo Credit
i am totally stealing kt. and wtd.
Glad you’re not stealing one which is nitroglycerin related.
Love the acryonyms! Could we just change ROTFBISCGU to Rotting Biscuit? They could just scream,”Rotting Biscuit!” every time they fall on the floor.
What the dickens?! lol
Do old people even say that anymore?
What a bunch of ageist crap. Your son is doing a lousy job of raising you.
With us old folks size still matters. Now it is the size of the keys on the damn cell phone. I now have a really big one. That is a SVC phone with really big keys. All I need is a funny honey to text. Please don’t send photo.
How do I text without my son finding out?He pays the phone bill and will say “Mom what the hell are you doing”? Harvey, I can appreciate your dilemma. Well maybe not.
A friend recently discovered that her mother (60′s/maybe 70′s) thought everytime she wrote LOL, her daughter was saying, “Lots of Love.” Maybe an acronym guide App for Sexting Seniors should be in the works?
Slam dunkin like Shaquille O’Neal, if he wrote ifonrmtaive articles.
ah!! see I am looking for my elderly grandmother to get a cellphone and the thought of her “sexting” freaks me out! she just wants a plain simple phone that can be used for emergencies and to keep in contact with loved ones. This all scares me. Has anyone found any good phones? I have heard nonstop about senior value cellphones with the company Tracfone and that sounds like a good idea because its supposedly made for seniors ( you know big keys, lit keys, big text, hearing aid compatible) and its only like 15 dollars for the SVC phone but I wanted to hear if anyone knew about it? Or had any thought! LOL- lots of love!