For over 100 years, Massengill has been the world-leader in feminine hygiene selling a variety of beloved vaginal irrigation products such as douches, douchebags and other premium douche accessories. But recent surveys show that the benefits of douching may be lost on younger generations of women who know nothing about the word “douche” except its common use as a slang word for pathetic loser.
Massengill is preparing to launch the new line of feminine fragrances with a series of Clean Cooter Classes around the country where company representatives will demonstrate the difference between a stinky vag and a fresh one, followed up by a refreshing vaginal irrigation with your choice of douche flavors.
When asked how she felt about the new line of douche scents, focus group participant, Ima Doosh said, “For the record, my vajayjay is super fresh. But for those unfortunate ladies who have stank coochies, I think these new flavors will be highly appealing.”
Massengill has approached Jennifer Love Hewitt to be the celebrity spokesvagina for the new campaign. Love Hewitt, who regularly vajazzles her “precious lady” with gems and stickers until it shines like a disco ball, is very excited about the new Massengill products. “I thought my vajajay was blinged out before, but with these alluring new aromas, my cooter is going to be living large.”