For over 100 years, Massengill has been the world-leader in feminine hygiene selling a variety of beloved vaginal irrigation products such as douches, douchebags and other premium douche accessories. But recent surveys show that the benefits of douching may be lost on younger generations of women who know nothing about the word “douche” except...
In a technologically advanced world, the ways that schools educate children are changing with the times. And the ways children try to get out of being educated are changing as well. Example: Physical Education. Rarely will a seasoned middle-school teacher accept “It’s my time of the month” or “I forgot my sneakers” as an...
There you are. We see you. Sitting there all smug and confident. You made your New Year’s Resolutions, marching head-long into 2012. This will be the year you make it happen. You need to hear the truth: your goals SUCK. 1. Spending more time with friends and family is a stupid idea. This is...
Radcliffe, PA — Pediatric surgeon Delmore Hicks claims to have made a significant breakthrough that may change the way surgery is performed on children under the age of four. According to Dr. Hicks, he has performed more than 170 surgical procedures on children in the last year…without anesthetic. Dr. Hicks says that, in June...
“Go fuck yourself, ya fuckin’ fuck.” That’s what Wayne Kesock (not his real name) replied when asked how his diagnosis with a serious life-threatening illness has changed his outlook. “Being sick fuckin’ sucks donkey ass. I’m not going to lie to make anyone feel better. I’m going to die. Fuckin’ fuck.” Four months ago, Kesock was...
The population is exploding. The economy is crashing. A general world outlook is less than optimistic. Unless, of course, you’re Lori Troy, creator and founder of Eazee Vee Do-It-Yourself Vasectomy Kits. “I wanted to add to our family income, but jobs with flexible hours are tough to find, “ says Troy, 35, mother of...
It started with a glass of rotten milk. “I took one sip, gagged, and chastised myself for not checking the expiration date”, said world-renowned gerontologist Dr. Sally Field, who is no relation to the world-renowned actress. “And that’s when it hit me. So many different products in the world, from milk to batteries to...
Anthropologists unearthed new evidence this week that finally sheds light on one of life’s great mysteries: where did the People of Wal-Mart shop before Wal-Mart existed? A recent study by graduate students at the University of Iowa provided some surprising answers. ”As we began our research, we held to three hypotheses,” explained lead graduate...
The soul-sucking beige of workplace cubicles. The mind-numbing hum of corporate machinery. Higher-ups who pay lip-service to “process improvement” and “thinking out of the box”. For over sixty years, the American office worker has all but resigned herself to being little more than a moderately educated cog in a minimally innovative setting. “It’s difficult...
